©2008, RK Silipo. All rights reserved.
You’ll find variations of this practice in books on Tantra. This is as it was given to my partner and me by our teachers, Hanna Katz-Jelfs and Martin Jelfs (Transcendence Tantra).
Choose a time when you are rested and alert, and when you will have no interruptions for at least a full hour. The room should be warm, well lit and quiet. In this exercise, you, Shiva (man) will worship your Shakti (woman). There is no talking between you at all. This is a silent practice.
You are both nude for this practice. Shakti takes a position that is relaxed and comfortable for her. You may then re-position her body into a pose you like, but remember that she must be comfortable in that position for 20 minutes.
You then look at her for 20 minutes. Remember, no talking. Look at her from every angle. Look at her face, her shoulders, her breasts, her limbs, her bottom, her belly, her pubis– take in her whole physical presence and being. You’ll probably notice things you’ve never noticed before. Appreciate your Shakti’s uniqueness.
Remember, once she is in the position you want, no more touching, and no talking.
After you have really looked at her for the 20 minutes, still in silence, lie down next to her. Practice carezza* for 40 minutes, or until you drift off to sleep.
This practice can be very powerful in deepening the bond between you, and it can be practical in the sense of Shiva learning to be aroused without needing or wanting to proceed to orgasm.
*Carezza is a technique wherein the man’s penis lies between the woman’s labia or in her yoni without any movement. It works best for some people when the man enters from behind while both partners lie on their sides.